Februrary 15, 2021 (10:34pm) – I’m sitting here in the dark and scrolling through Facebook because there’s not a whole lot to do here without electricity, and my phone still has 70%. I came across a post that really humbled me and touched my heart so deeply that I asked if I could share it with you all tonight.
In the midst of so many of us “struggling” without water or electricity for a night or two, we fail to realize that this is the life for the homeless population. Please read this beautiful story and be grateful for what you have. A couple of days without is nothing compared to other lives with nothing at all.
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Author of Post: Kelly Lynn
There is no better time than the present to be kind.
My apartment got down to 30°, no power all day since about 2am, it’s an actual outage not a rolling blackout, and all roads I needed to use were closed.
I finally packed up Benjamin, Meshach, and I in the car to go over to Aunt Erin’s house & it took over an hour to get 10 miles. Erin & I decide to fill up our tanks, which mind you took about 30 mins, and as we’re sitting there, I see a man get dropped off with a bag and blanket.
As I’m sitting there, I’m watching him and it truly breaks my heart to think that this man has nowhere to go, no food, no transportation, nobody helping him. I told Erin, we need to help him. Erin & I decided to help him, he asked us to take him to the bridge at 1604/35 so he could sleep in the porta potty. Can you imagine? He just wanted somewhere to get him out of the cold. We took him to another gas station (the one we were at wasn’t open inside), got him about $50 of groceries, took him down the street where we got him a hotel for two nights. This man was so frail & brittle that he could get knocked over with a strong wind. There was no way we were leaving him out in this frigid weather that San Antonio isn’t used to.
We got him all checked in, his groceries set out, turned up the heat in his hotel room, and told him we would be back to check on him tomorrow. Y’all. This man was so appreciative he kept trying to offer us his $10, his moonpie he had in his bag, and started to cry. He kept thanking us and at one point told me that nobody would ever stop to talk to him or help him. That Jesus must have sent us.
I don’t normally share things like this, as in doing something good for a stranger or paying it forward. I don’t need to be recognized for doing a “good deed” because this is just who I am. This is straight from my heart. I share this because right now, San Antonio is dealing with weather & conditions we aren’t used to. While I grew up in weather like this, many have not. So if you see someone who is out during this time and needs help. Don’t judge, don’t snub them, just help. Give them warm food, a blanket, a place to stay, a ride, a cup of coffee, anything. I was so worried about my own apartment being cold, when this whole time there are so many others who don’t even have a home.
Be there. Be human. Be decent. Be kind. Love one another.
It has only “snowed” twice in my lifetime. By “snowed,” it was very, very light & I vaguely remember it. The last week, 2/14/21-2/20/21, has definitely been a week to remember.
I dreaded Valentine’s this year, as it would be my first “single” one in the last 3 years. (yes, I was in a very quiet, low key, off and on, semi-long weird relationship that many did not know about, as I’m not one to put my business out there.) But as I dreaded it, and also just recovering from having COVID, I was trying to find joy in the occasion. I cooked myself a nice dinner, made chocolate covered strawberries (ate them all), and watched rom-coms by myself. It was very therapeutic, and I needed that self-care.
Little did anyone know that it would snow later that evening, leading into a week full of chaos and panic upon many.
The snow was so beautiful as it came falling from the sky. I was so excited, and I jumped out of bed and began taking pics to show my family. The next morning, my entire department called into work, so I ended up staying home too. It was a lovely day off, and I got to drink my coffee and just enjoy watching the snow fall from my bedroom windows. Beautiful sight to see!!
Later on, most of my immediate family began getting affected by this unexpected weather, and their homes lost power & water. My heart went out most to my grandparents, as they don’t have very good legs and they hurt easily when the temperature drops. I was very saddened at the thought of them being cold in their house with no heat and no water. I offered my home to them, but my grandparents wanted to be in the comfort of their own home when all was restored (we didn’t think it was going to take several days). While I prayed for my family to be safe and warm, I also extended the same invitation to everyone to come over, as I had not lost my power nor water. While my parents declined the offer, due to their pets, my younger brothers gladly accepted and were here Monday evening.
My favorite part of the story – my journey in:
Finding Joy during Snowpocalypse-2021. Brandon & Jacob arrived on Monday and stayed with me till Saturday. This is the most time I have been able to spend with them in the last four-and-a-half years, since I moved out of my parents house after high school. Brandon & Jacob are not the talkers out of us four siblings. (Chris isn’t part of his story because he’s at his second home in Corpus Christi; but if you’re reading this, I miss you dearly Pop Pops and wish you were here with us this past week.)
Anyways, they’re not chatter boxes whatsoever. But they love to laugh during movies, love video games, love my cats, and if you pick the right topic to discuss, they’re super smart, knowledgeable, and can really start talking. So when I say we had quality time, it truly was just time spent together laughing at whatever movie we were watching and being able to just hangout.
I was able to stay home with them Wednesday & Thursday, and we had tons of fun. I stayed up way past my usual bed time. We had plenty of snacks. Watched movies. Played in the snow. I cooked more meals than I had ever cooked before, had to make sure my boys were well-fed while they were staying with me and tried to make them as comfy as possible here. Point of the story, we had a blast.
Today is Saturday, and my parents’ power turned back on as of yesterday; but the boys stayed with me another night. I got home today not feeling so well, just very tired from work & still have not regained my energy 100% from COVID; so I think I just ran around work a little too much for the day. (HEB and the mad house it has been this week is a story for another time.) I thought that they would want to go back home as soon as I got off; but they ended up asking if we can grab Whataburger, so I said, “sure why not some fast food after all these home cooked meals.” It was not fast food. We waited forever to find a Whataburger that didn’t have an hour-long line and one that would have French fries. An hour later, we got home with our food and watched a movie before the boys were going to take off. Towards the end of the movie, I began feeling sad because I knew it was almost time for them to leave, and I didn’t want our time together to come to an end.
After the movie, I ended up finding them upstairs playing air hockey, and I asked if we could play some Rock Band before they took off. We played for a good while and that brought back childhood memories, and we were able to laugh some more while the boys roasted each other on who’s singing was worse to the old throwback songs. We probably could’ve kept playing all night and completed the whole game but I have to be up in a few hours for work.
Our sibling bonding time had, sadly, come to an end, and it was time for us to part ways. (At least for a few days till Mom offers me some dinner at their house or something.) As the boys drove off and I came back in and locked up, I looked down the hallway of my house, and I saw an empty & quiet home once again. I drank my glass of water before bed and couldn’t get over how silent it was. My brothers are crazy night owls, so the last several nights, I have been hearing them laugh nonstop in the living room, making pizza at 1am, washing dishes at 5am, and watching movies at 6am. (I don’t know how they do it.) But within a matter of minutes, it just returned to such tranquility.
As I’m laying here, I can’t quite sleep. I miss them already, and I can’t get over what an unexpected week it turned out to be.
I typically enjoy being alone, living alone, doing things alone. But tonight I find myself realizing that having them here filled a void that I didn’t quite know I had. It’s a bittersweet and not fully describable feeling.
For me, It was much more than just a week of snow & mayhem across Texas. I opened my eyes to a lot of realizations. I got to spend the best quality time with two of my brothers. I was able to experience snow as an adult… & I found Joy in the midst of such chaos.
“to my brothers: you are the bestest friends I was born to have.“
Marriage can be such a beautiful relationship to have; but let’s face it – these days, it’s a huge accomplishment to stay married even over 5 years. For couples that remain married, people wonder what their secret might be. So now imagine a couple that has not only been married for 26 years, but they have been in a 35-year relationship since they were 12 and 13 years old! They have practically grown up together and seen each other grow from awkward teenagers to beautiful and loving adults. I had the privilege of knowing this couple in high school, and I always admired their loyalty to one another. Knowing that they are still married and experiencing Joy in Love made me want to talk to them and hear what they had to say about their relationship and marriage. Here is the story of Elijah & Wendy Gomez….
Eli & Wendy in middle school
Eli and Wendy met when they were 6th graders at Whittier Middle School. They both shared a common interest of music, and both were band members. They only had one short breakup one summer of middle school; but since then, they have remained inseparable.
Eli & Wendy at Edison Senior Prom
They remained together throughout high school and continued as both stage band and marching band members. They even went to their Senior Prom together.
Eli & Wendy married in 1994
In 1994, two years after graduating from Edison High School, Eli & Wendy were married. They now have a 21-year old daughter, 17-year old son, and 15-year old son. Wendy works for New York Life, and Eli is a self-employed artist.
Eli & Wendy with their family
I asked Eli & Wendy what keeps them connected and strong in their relationship because they just make it look so easy and they are so compatible. I believe that in talking to them, the strengths that I observed were primarily their faith and the fact that their different traits and personalities actually complement the other and bring balance to the relationship dynamic. They rely heavily on their faith in Jesus Christ and put Him at the center of their home. They have a pretty simple life and don’t really like extravagant things or the cliché romantic types of things. But simplicity works perfectly for them. They have movie date nights, they take turns making breakfast, and they both help with the housework inside and outside. They don’t live off the stereotypical gender roles of a husband and wife that push a man to do the outside work and the woman to do the inside work. They both help in all areas, and they do it together. In their particular relationship, they both share a passion for comics, Star Wars, fantasy super heroes, and pretty much all things you would typically see at a Comic Con convention. I actually believe that might be one of the tightest glues for them second to their faith. Anyone else might get annoyed with Eli’s display of comic figurines, comic books, and collection of books; but Wendy fully supports it and gets just as excited to find these same types of items.
Wendy believes that the key to their strong marriage is communication. While they are both passive, they do still argue. But they do it in a respectful way and take time to listen to one another. In speaking of faith, Eli says “God’s plan is here, even if we don’t see it….knowing that God always has our backs helps us.”
This love story began with an accidental meeting online. It was July 2004 when the internet and online group chats and saying were still very new. Nancy lived in El Paso, and Christian was a Marine who was stationed in Iraq. Nancy’s youth pastor had encouraged her to join a group chat so that they would be able to chat online. His name was Chris Medina, so when Nancy saw “Chris M” on the group chat for Christian singles, she immediately added him and began chatting with him. She would eventually find out that this was the wrong “Chris,” and she was actually chatting with Christian Mendoza, a Marine and complete stranger to her.
They still continued to chat with each other despite the accidental meeting, and they eventually met in person when Christian was on leave in El Paso a few months later. He and Nancy fell in love quickly, and he proposed to her on New Year’s Eve 2004. They were married on February 25, 2005.
They will celebrate their 16th anniversary this month. They have a 13-year old daughter and an 11-year old son. They just recently opened an automotive business in Lytle.
Thinking back to their chance meeting online and the fact that they have endured 16 years of marriage and obstacles, Nancy is still thankful that they chose each other. She knows that God was working behind the scenes, even if she didn’t realize it.
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed the previous parts of the story, I recommend you go and read them before starting this one. Today is the final piece of her story so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with the final piece, Part 7 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
Throughout all these first 6 losses in my life, I have had small moments where I get the feeling of God so strong that I say, “okay, I’m going to stay on this path.” And then there are others where I just want to spiral downward. And I’m not not going to lie; I have spiraled. I’ve gone down the path where I’ve been homeless; sleeping in my car; having nothing; having to start over all over again; drinking a lot to mask the pain; surrounding myself with people who do not follow in God’s footsteps; and so many more things that I’ll leave unmentioned. But when I look back on my life, I realize that things could have taken a WAY worse turn. I have always tried to keep my head up, be the positive light, the “glass half full” kind of girl. I believe that there is so much good in life and that we shouldn’t take it all for granted. There is so much hate and turmoil in our world, that what good would it do to add to that myself? What good would it do to keep doing down the path that leads me to nothing but hurt, destruction, trouble, sorrow, and bitterness? I have always loved and believed in God; I was just angry for so many years that I never was able to fully open my heart to accept ALL He has to offer.
For about two years (2017-2018), I was on a small downhill spiral where I was drinking a lot, going out, had a few bad influencing friends that I allowed to steer me in the wrong direction. I fought daily, knowing that I was not doing what God wanted me to do, knew that He was disappointed in me. I knew that my Mom in Heaven was disappointed in me. Then in September of 2019, I found out I was pregnant again. This time, by someone whom I thought was my best friend, someone I truly thought would be in one another’s lives forever. It didn’t matter the capacity; we just always said we would be there for one another. He was someone who I had spent hours with, talking, laughing, and so much more.
When I found out I was pregnant, I was beyond happy, but I was scared even more so. Here I was, a single 38-year-old woman who had lost my job and was on unemployment; and I’m having a baby with my “best friend” who used the excuse we couldn’t be together because of my ex. This time around, I was going to make sure I did everything I could to prepare for this baby, to have a healthy pregnancy, and to take all the necessary precautions. I also turned to God a lot more. Does that mean I was perfect? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I still struggled with my own issues and sin. I kept thinking that being let go from my job was a blessing. This WAS God’s will, and He wanted to make sure that I left that stressful, toxic environment so I could focus on taking care of my unborn child and myself and to prepare for this life change. And I did as He wanted, what I thought was the best thing over the next 9 months. Things were rocky some days with my best friend, and others were amazing. There were lots of laughs, tears, baby name talk, plans on what would be good for our child, dreams and aspirations we had for our baby, creating a playlist that I could play for the baby while I was still pregnant; but eventually also heartache that I endured because I had to face the reality he did not want to build a family with me. That hurt the most. I never understood and still think of it from time to time now why he wouldn’t want to have that family life.
Fast forward to April 2020, and our little miracle blessing Benjamin Anthony was born! After all the pain I’ve endured in life with trying to have a baby, I FINALLY have my miracle and blessing. And it was all in God’s timing. He had His plan, and I just wasn’t ready for it until now. I will never understand some of the things that God has shown me, and that is okay. It has been a very hard 10 months, but I love this little boy more than life itself and he has truly changed me. His father hasn’t been involved at all, (he did have 4 visits with Benjamin for a total of 5 hours in 9 months), but he doesn’t want to have anything to do with Benjamin. I don’t know how someone would want to walk away from their child, but I won’t force him to be involved. He has a life of his own and there is no place for Benjamin. And while I consider the loss of who I ultimately considered my best friend Loss #7, he gave me the best blessing in the world. Every once in a while, I still find myself missing our friendship, but I know in time that will go away. It has already diminished quite a bit, but the biggest challenge is the loss for Benjamin. I will always love him, as he was a big part of my life and then as mentioned he gave me the greatest blessing and thing I had always wanted in life. He gave me my son, and I will be forever thankful for that and love him.
Growing up the way I did, growing up without the real “family” connection, not knowing my father, not having a bond with my stepdad when I was taken from him for so many years, never knowing who my mom truly was and having those moments of laughter, tears, watching me graduate, have a baby, or just those mommy/daughter days, I NEVER want my son to experience that. I never want him to know that he wasn’t wanted, wasn’t loved, and wasn’t a priority. All I can do now is overcome. I have to turn it ALL over to God and know that He will never give us more than we can handle, even if we have to keep reminding ourselves over and over. There is so much joy in life, so much out there for us to experience and be thankful for. God just lets us make the choice, and He lets us decide.
After all the turmoil I have endured in the past 40 years, I can’t let the enemy win and go down that path of destruction, whether it’s self-destruction or more. I have chosen to rise above that and be happy. Be blessed. Be loved. And give love. I have reintroduced God’s word into my life by actively participating in a Bible study, I’ve been more active in church and volunteering, as I have found my forever home finally. God’s grace is what will lead us to pure happiness and knowing that He loves us all and only wants us to do one thing, which is trust in Him and believe. I am nowhere near to where I need to be, but I know I’m far from where I’ve been, and I love myself and who I’ve become. We should never use the excuse “well that’s how I was raised” or “they don’t know any better” because we do learn it, whether as a child, or adult. We learn what is right, what is wrong, and the ability to think on our own and make decisions. I DO believe however, that things that happen to us as we are young and growing up help shape who we are as adults. But we can use that to our benefit to only keep the negative/bad experiences as a testimony, a story of what we went through. And now to look back and realize how far we’ve come and learned and grown. So many times people continue to use that as a crutch, and sometimes I do think that it was so late in their lives that maybe they never got the help they needed or they never had a wake up call like I had. And I do pray for those people. I pray for the ones who are lost and need our help, need His help the most. But I am living proof that someone who has dealt with loss, a rough upbringing without a lot of love, and no religious background CAN bounce back and do good.
As I said, I am nowhere near where I need to be, but I am learning to take one day at a time and know that through it all, I can rely on God to always help me through. God can move mountains, and He will again. We are only given one life, one chance on this earth, so don’t waste it with bitterness and regret. I tell this to you today, not to make you feel sorry for me, not to be judged, not to make you think I am perfect and completely holy, but to give you hope. That if you are struggling, you too can overcome. Build up your circle, your support system with those who truly love our Lord and it will help see you through.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Today is February 12, 2021, which is Benjamin Anthony’s 10-month birthday! What an amazing 10 months it has been celebrating Benjamin’s life!
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed the previous parts of the story, I recommend you go and read them before starting this one. I hope that you will follow through the 7 days so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with Part 6 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
Now we will jump completely in a different direction and talk about the only “blood” family I had left from that small family many years ago, which is my older brother. We had a very distant relationship after he left when I was in middle school. He turned to drugs and got into some really bad stuff. We didn’t have much contact from about 1993 until about 2008. It was only a random phone call here and there. He still lived in Colorado, but something was just off, and he wasn’t the same brother I remembered as a child. Drugs can do that to you. Eventually he ended up having 4 daughters from 2 different women and then came to “disown” them, stating he didn’t even acknowledge that he had children. My feelings on that are a whole other story. That is just down right sickening.
He married a woman sometime in between those years, and she was about 10 years older than him, having her own son and grandbabies. In 2008, he had reached out to me while I was living in Florida, and he and his wife had nowhere to go. They had no place to live, no money, no food, nothing. Mind you, he is in Colorado, so that was a bit challenging. I had just gone through the miscarriage trauma and was feeling alone, so I reached out to God and prayed. I wasn’t even sure if I was doing it “right”, but I prayed. I prayed to find out what I should do, and I came to the decision to have my brother and his wife move to Florida with me. I sent them money, they brought the little they had, and they drove to Florida within a week. At the time, I was living in a 1-bedroom condo, so it was very tight. They stayed for a few months, my brother tried to find work, which was challenging because he was a registered sex offender. Just to put it out there, when he was about 25, he was charged with allowing a child (the kid was a 13 year old boy, which was his girlfriend’s son), to watch pornography, while he and his much older girlfriend were partaking in adult activities. Ok, back on track. He couldn’t find work. His wife ended up finding a job at the closest Walmart. Months went by, and he still wasn’t working; so only his wife and I were supporting the household. They had been added to my cell phone plan, and I wasn’t charging them rent. I only wanted them to save up to get their own place.
Around October 2009, I made the decision to move to Texas, and they were more than welcome to come with me or stay. They decided to stay and moved with me. On December 2nd, 2009 I woke up thinking we were going to go Christmas shopping. I walked out of my room only to find the house empty, all the cash I had in a vase in the kitchen was gone, and they were nowhere to be found. They had blocked my phone number (mind you the cell phones were on my plan) and I couldn’t reach them. I had no idea where they went. Nothing, not a single word or explanation. I was so upset that once again I had been used and stolen from in my life by someone I loved and was helping. I disconnected their phone lines and didn’t hear anything from them at all….until 2014.
I received a message on Facebook from his wife. My brother had committed suicide. No explanation, no details, nothing. Again, it was only a short brief message that he had taken his own life and that there would be no funeral…”just wanted to let you know.” Our relationship was very toxic and distant, but at the end of the day, I had forgiven him, and I loved him. He was my brother. We had both gone through a lot, and we only had one another; but he chose to go the other way. Regardless of our history, I was deeply saddened, hurt, and lost. The only connection that I had left to my mom’s bloodline was gone.
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed the previous parts of the story, I recommend you go and read them before starting this one. I hope that you will follow through the 7 days so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with Part 5 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
Fast forward to 2012. I had moved to San Antonio in 2010 and fell in love with all that it had to offer. I still love it to this day. I only miss the white sandy beaches of Destin. These beaches in Texas are no match for that white sand and crystal-clear blue-green water in Destin. I was dating a guy who was very emotional and mentally abusive. While he never laid a hand on me, he was very violent around the house, breaking pictures, flipping over couches and other furniture, and saying some of the most hateful things to me that anyone could hear.
We ended up breaking up in June, and by middle of July, I found out that I was pregnant. So now, I’m thinking I’m finally going to get the baby I’ve always dreamed of, the one God has chosen for me. Again, faith slips in, and I start thanking Him for what He has brought into my life, even from this troubled person who I had been dating. When I told my ex that I was pregnant, he was excited, and for a split second, for a short moment, he seemed to be “normal” again; and I assumed that meant we were getting back together. I had accepted a job in Colorado, and we both moved up there. Again, here is me thinking we were back together. He just left Texas, where his entire family is, and he was coming with me to start a new life as a couple and to welcome our baby. I don’t really need to go into details of the next few months, because even as I write this, tears are streaming down my face because the pain that I endured physically, mentally, and emotionally are too extreme for words. All I was trying to do was what I thought was best for my baby, for him, and for myself. But it only caused pain. I was dealing with a rough pregnancy, and I was having a lot of health problems.
Our baby girl was born on March 15th, 2013, and she shortly passed away after birth. She was 2 weeks overdue, and when she was born, she had a lot of problems with her lungs. She passed away from what is called Meconium Aspiration Syndrome. To depict how heartbreaking this was for me, even more so, was the fact that the father was nowhere to be found. He had left me at the hospital all alone. By the time I was released and went home, he had packed up and moved out and said this was too much for him to handle. TOO MUCH FOR HIM? Are you serious? A time like this, we needed each other. We needed to support one another and try to mend our hearts and handle the loss together. The pain was too much to bear alone, so I moved back to San Antonio where I could be surround by friends and framily (yes FRAMILY – friends that ARE chosen family).
Loss #5, the death of my second child, but this one was one I held in my arms for a moment in time and she was ripped away from me just like that.
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed the previous parts of the story, I recommend you go and read them before starting this one. I hope that you will follow through the 7 days so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with Part 4 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
When I was 19, I decided to pack up and take everything I owned (which wasn’t much) and moved to Florida. I had always wanted to live in Florida because that is where my Mom grew up. So I felt my heart just tugging me to go there. I packed up and drove to Florida from Colorado and stopped at the first city I came to that I felt was for me. I ended up living in Destin, Florida for 10 years, and it was a very CRAZY time in my life.
I really got introduced to God in many different aspects than before. I attended a few Pentecostal churches that to be honest, scared the daylights out of me. It was too much for me to take in, and I didn’t understand any of the messages, the way people were speaking in tongues (I mean at first, I had no idea what they were even doing and what that meant), the people shouting and falling out in the aisles, and just E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. I was terrified, and I ran far from that. And again, I would question God – it brought back my thoughts of all my loss, wondering how and why God would allow all this heartbreak to happen in my life and in my family’s life. Why would He take a Mother from her children at such a young age? How could He let that drunk driver get off without spending time in prison? How could He let him walk the streets after taking the life of such a beautiful woman and person? My bitterness towards God grew and grew. I started getting involved in things I shouldn’t have, hanging around those I shouldn’t, drifting further and further from God and the path that He wanted me on.
It wasn’t until I was about 25, that I truly decided enough is enough. I started going to another church where the pastor spoke in ways that I understood, and he made sense to me. He showed me that God did NOT take my Mom away from me. He explained that there is God and then there is the Devil. There is good and evil, and God is love. It was then that I turned to God and gave Him my life. I accepted that Jesus was sent here for us, all of us, no matter who we are and where we come from. I gave my life over to Jesus and was baptized shortly after. I was still struggling with plenty of sin (and I believe we all struggle with it daily), but I was going to church weekend after weekend trying to make things right.
In 2008, I started dating a man who was a pastor’s son, but he was secretly an alcoholic. I found out that I was pregnant, and, in the Summer of 2008, we were expecting a baby girl. One night we got into an argument over strollers, and he was drinking and said he was going to leave me and never come back. He said that he didn’t care about our baby and wanted me and her both gone. He then pushed me down a flight of stairs at our condo, and he left me lying there unconscious. I never saw him again. The next thing I knew, I woke up in the hospital only to be told I had suffered minor injuries, but I had lost my baby girl.
Loss #4 was the miscarriage of my first pregnancy due to violence. And again, I was angry that my faith in God led me to more heartache and loss.
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed the previous parts of the story, I recommend you go and read them before starting this one. I hope that you will follow through the 7 days so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with Part 3 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
After moving to Colorado, my Dad was dating a woman who was a lot older, and she was just mean. She didn’t like kids, nor want them, yet here she was dating a man with two kids – one is 9, and the other is 15. He eventually broke things off with her after my older brother turned to drugs and left home when he was 16 and never came back. He was still in town, but he wouldn’t build a relationship with my Dad, and he made things challenging. In 7th grade, my Dad started dating another woman, which he eventually moved in with. Where was I? I was left home alone, in a trailer with no heat/electricity, no food, and I would have to walk to school in the cold and snow, by myself. And yes, the tales you always hear about people walking uphill in the snow, are true in this case! I spent many nights alone and many weekends alone.
I started hanging out with the wrong crowd of girls, and one day we were all caught shoplifting from a store. We were arrested, and parents were called. My Dad came to get me, and as I am sure you can imagine, he was NOT happy at all. I was going to be disciplined the only way he knew how, which was spanking. Even though I was in 7th grade, getting spanked was not unusual for me. Well as a typical kid, I was trying to “dodge” the metal spoon and he ended up getting my legs. The next day I wore shorts to school and there were marks and bruises on my legs, and that opened a case to be investigated. Being rebellious and a bratty kid, I insisted that I never wanted to go home, that I didn’t want to live with him, and that things were terrible. I’m sure I embellished more than what the actual truth was (to a degree), and it turned sour really quick. I was taken from my Dad, put in foster care at the age of 12, and I never returned home. Bouncing around foster home to foster home and even a group home a couple of times, I saw things that were so heartbreaking. I thought I had it bad at home, but there are so many children out there who truly do have it worse. We should ALWAYS keep that in mind. For 2 years, I was placed with one family, and I later found out that the father had been molesting one of the oldest boys for years. I didn’t find out until I was well into my twenties. We think that foster homes are supposed to be safe havens, but not all of them are.
While I do consider this Loss #3, losing that “home life” with the last person I considered family after the death of my Mom, it did bring some great things into my life. Being in numerous foster care homes, I was introduced to a lot of different things, one being faith and religion. I started attending a few different churches and was introduced to God and the Bible. Although I can look back on it now and realize it only caused more confusion, it helped open that door to allow the faith and Word of God to roll in. I was able to attend a various amount of churches, concerts, and even was able to attend “Acquire the Fire” as an early teen, which was a wonderful experience. But then God became a distant memory as time went on and I finished school.
This story is a very special one to me, and I felt that it was so important to share. It is a very complex story filled with losses throughout Kelly’s life. In order for readers to really absorb every detail, I have decided to break up Kelly’s life story into sections, which will eventually lead up to her present life. Trust me, there IS a happy ending here, but it comes with much loss and heartache. I began sharing her story in Part 1, so if you missed that story, I recommend you go and read that one before starting this one. I hope that you will follow through the 7 days so that you can see how her story unfolds and where she is now. Here we go with Part 2 of 7…
Author: Kelly Lynn
I honestly can say that I don’t really remember too much of my early childhood. Probably from about 10 and younger is pretty much a blur, and it has always been that way. Most of my memories from that time period are based on what has been shared with me from my stepdad (who I will be referring to as my Dad through the rest) and then a few pieces from my brother. After my mom left my father, she met my Dad in 1983. They began dating and were later married in 1985. From what I am told and the few small memories that I have, things were good. It was finally the family life that it appeared to be inside and out.
I can faintly remember the night that my life would be forever changed – June 3rd, 1988. But what I can remember is sitting down on the couch after throwing a temper tantrum with tears streaming down my face. My mom was hugging me and saying “you can go next time,” and then she turned on our favorite movie, “The Wizard of Oz.” She walked out the door after saying “I love you,” and she would see me soon. She was going to a baby shower with a friend, and I couldn’t go. The next morning, I woke up and ran into my parents’ room, and neither of them were there. I went downstairs (we lived in a townhouse), and the house was full of people. My parents’ best friends and their kids were there, my brother, my Dad, but no sign of my Mom. I just remember the adults being sad, and my Dad’s eyes looked weird to me. My Dad came over to me and said that he loved me and had to leave for a while, but he would be back. He took my brother with him; I do remember that. I didn’t understand what was going on. I was being left at home, couldn’t find my Mom, my Dad and brother had just left, and I’m with our family friends. It felt like days had passed and I was without my family. In reality, it was less than 24 hours, and then the call came. My Dad had called and told the family friend the news. He was deciding to take my Mom off life support. In the early hours of June 5th, 1988, my Mom took her last breath and went to see our Heavenly Father. She was taken from our lives, from her family, friends, animals, and this wonderful world to be with Him in a better place. As I’m told, she was driving to the baby shower with her friend, when she was struck by a drunk driver. Her injuries were so severe that there was never going to be a life for her.
Losing a parent is one of the most devastating losses that anyone can endure. Regardless of age, it’s never something we wish upon a child. It rips my heart apart every time I hear someone curse their mother. We all know life is so short and we are NEVER promised tomorrow. There are times we get in disagreements with our family, but just always remember that at the end of the day, we are to love our parents. I am still very sensitive to this topic when I hear and/or read of complaints from friends about their mothers. Don’t take it for granted. Don’t take them for granted. Keep in mind (although I haven’t really mentioned it), that I wasn’t raised religious at all, and this happening really threw a wrench into any chance at faith/religion in my life. My Dad was so upset and bitter towards God for “taking” my Mom that he never fully recovered. Even to this day, he still struggles tremendously, and it’s been 33 years. He held a grudge against God and cursed him, made terrible choices and mistakes; and life with him was a complete roller coaster ride for the next 5 years. Even though he struggled with his relationship with God (if there was even one to begin with), I think this was God’s first real way of reaching out to me. I think He was protecting me by my mom leaving me at home, which was through God’s grace. I can’t begin to tell you how many places that we lived, how many women he dated, or what even happened in home life. It was a rough ride, and then we moved to Colorado when I was 9. Things escalated and came down crashing even more.
That was Loss #2, the death of my Mom. Still to this day, it’s one of the biggest struggles in my life.
He just wanted somewhere to get him out of the cold. We took him to another gas station (the one we were at wasn’t open inside), got him about $50 of groceries, took him down the street where we got him a hotel for two nights. This man was so frail & brittle that he could get knocked over with a strong wind. There was no way we were leaving him out in this frigid weather that San Antonio isn’t used to.
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